Saturday, 30 November 2013

Marry go round

How time flies! Just five years back I had written a blithe article about ‘How to stay (happily) Unmarried’. I was young(er!), at college, enjoying the process of academics and marriage was the last thing on my mind. The usual things that we discussed in those days were who got hitched with whom, who was having a fling on the side, and who will (are they that serious really?) tie the knot. 

Marriage was just like one of the issues in world politics - ‘it’s somehow important but I don’t understand why’ and here I am now, running at the sound of every spoken word that remotely suggests marriage . How I seem to be failing my own article!  

It’s simply amazing how a single issue can permeate your entire life. When you hit the first quarter of your life, it seems everywhere you go, everyone you know has someone they know who is getting married to someone they do not (even) know and it is somehow, invariably, one of the topics of the discussion! Everyone you respect has an equal gesture of gentle care for you when they declare that e.g. (no offences intended), ‘I wish you spend your next birthday with your husband’!! Forget global warming, inflation or corruption. There is just one concern on the entire planet because wherever I go, I hear the echoes of a singular yearning, the desire of the world to witness the unfolding of an event of great meaning (and consequences I am sure ) - ‘the point of my existence’!

The stakes of the games people play have increased by leaps and bounds. Generation Y (you may call them Generation ‘Why?’) wants to know why they ‘have’ to get married. We do have a fancy job, a salary we flaunt in our lifestyle and which affords us our dearest passions, a dream to cast our lives in, and maybe a love we want to believe will last a life. Life is carefully guarded, meant to make all our dreams come true. We roll on with it on the energy of our soaring aspirations and rousing dreams. May our hearts never break! And marriage! It’s certainly uncertain! But hey, we are talking about India, aren’t we? We should stick to our samskars. So, young Indian marriage-ables, despite their take on marriage, live-ins, open relationships and never-say-die attitude take the ‘seven-steps’ of their life hoping to walk the entire seven-life distance together, because..

ü  Parents think I should get married.
ü  It’s high time! Better marry than be sorry!
ü  Society!
ü  Arranged marriages last longer!
ü  Papa knows best!
ü  Time to upgrade socially!
ü  I should be getting some! 

Phew! That’s quite the daunting list. I remember making one of the most dramatic monologues of my life and I quote (myself, really) that “Mummy. I don’t want to marry a man’s salary, his social status, his family or his caste. I just want to marry a good man. Because when I am in trouble, I don’t know whether his social status, his salary or his family will be there for me.” There, I am giving myself a pat on my little back for making mum so clueless!

So till my ‘knight in shining armour’ comes galloping along, I hereby choose to stay ‘happily unmarried!’



  1. Interesting post. Loved it. While reading this post, for a minute, I thought you are against marriage. Glad to note, at the end, you said you are looking for a good man and waiting that knight in shining armor. Here is one unsolicited suggestion. While you are waiting for him, please be pro active and go after him also. If you don’t do that, a few years from now, all those good men would have a wife and 2 children.

  2. I want to add a disclaimer.. :) In my article I did not mean to suggest I don't like good advice. Let the words flow :) :) :)

    1. Divya is it necessary tht person must be your hubby who will support you or be good to you. Is mrg is just a societal pressure. Why cant frnds whtr it is he or she can be tht good person

  3. Found a good man! Cool. Congratulations. Hope this progresses towards a happy marriage and you both live a long and happy and peaceful married life. God bless you both.

  4. You are not alone dear.....all our batch mates are suffering from the same problem.. :-)


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